Que Sera Sera

Today, I learnt that this term means 'Whatever will be, will be...'. I came across an article in the newspaper regarding this term, and when I came to office this morning, the first thing I did was to find its meaning. I heard this song once in the movie 'Gadar - Ek prem katha'. I could guess its implication from that song in 'Pukar', but I wanted to learn more about its origin.

This is a song of the 1950's by Doris Day. I looked up for the lyrics and this is how it goes :

When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother
What will I be
Will I be pretty
Will I be rich
Here's what she said to me

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be

When I grew up and fell in love
I asked my sweetheart
What lies ahead
Will we have rainbows
Day after day
Here's what my sweetheart said

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be

Now I have Children of my own
They ask their mother
What will I be
Will I be handsome
Will I be rich
I tell them tenderly

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be
Que Sera, Sera

The meaning is lovely, the tune is mesmerising. If only I could live my life as it suggests! If only I could throw all my cares to the winds and live a carefree life - atleast for a day! I want to do that; I want to stop feeling as if I'm the only one shrouded by dark clouds; I want to keep reminding myself that I'm better off than more than half the people in the world; I'm so much luckier than the people who are mercilessly killed everyday around the world, than those who are tortured to death, than the women who are raped, scarred for life, burnt to death...there are unimaginable horrors going on in the world every minute; my situation is miniscule before them.

Actually, I didn't set out to write all this. Till y'day I had other things to talk about. But bcoz I don't yet have access to the Internet from home, I forget half the things I intend to write about, by the time I start to write in the office. I do try to covertly jot some points down while at home, but now that my brother is with us (he came yesterday), I can't take any chances. Till I have access to the Net at home in about 2-3 months, I'll have to make do with this arrangement.

Nothing much happening in life. I have this painful throat infection that makes me feel like I have needles down my throat each time I swallow. My granny has joined us for a few days. Her fractured arm is much better now - the bone has healed itself and the plaster has gone. Only some stiffness remains, which should go too, in a couple of weeks. My exams are coming up in July, and as Maths is involved this time, I am getting jittery :(

Coming back to the song, there are certain things in life which I've just let go; but there are certain others, which I'll stubbornly and dedicatedly cling to, even after my last breath. I ask of Him to either lighten my load or strengthen my back.